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Maryland State Archives Jeffersonian, Towson, Maryland mdsa_sc3410_1_81-0885 Enlarge and print image (5M) |
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Maryland State Archives Jeffersonian, Towson, Maryland mdsa_sc3410_1_81-0885 Enlarge and print image (5M) |
| THE JEFFERSONIAN, TOWSON, MARYLAND Saturday, January 12, 1924—Page 13 If there were as many telephones In 'Europe in proportion to population as there are in the United States, Europe would have over 62,022,660 telephones. Europe actually had, however, on the latest date for which figures have been published, only 5,606,252 telephones, or less than one-eleventh the number that there would be if the European telephone system were as well developed as those of the United States. Over the Fence Is Out. A Scottish farmer was noted for his strength and skill. A young peer, a great pugilistic amateur, had come from London to fight the athletic Scot. The latter was working In an Inclos-ure a little distance from the house when the amateur arrived. His lordship tied his horse to a tree and addressed the farmer thus: "Friend, I have heard a great deal atollt^QJl^ajxiLIJiay^jQme. fuJonsLffiax fo' see which of us Ts" The' TfeTter wrestler." The Scotchman, without answering, seized the young man by the middle of his body, pitched him over the fence and returned to his work. When his lordship recovered his breath he stood silent. "Well," said the farmer, "have you anything more to say to me?" "No," was the reply, "but perhaps you'll be so good as to throw me my horse!"—Edinburgh Scotsman. Tak r!®a Off Its Feet I Success is tfec Talk ©£ the Country The year just ended has been the greatest of all the fifteen years of Overland history. A great year made by great cars—the greatest Overlands ever built. Greatest in looks, power, action, comfort—and money's T&orth? Look at the new Overland Champion, for instance. It brings a quality closed car with features and utilities hitherto unheard of within reach of every purse. America's first all- purpose car—conceded to be the most useful motor car on wheels. The Champion and all Overland models have the bigger Overland engine—brute power with extreme economy. Leaders in economy — leaders on the road — leaders in the many satisfactions they bring to owners. See them. Sit in them. Ask for a sample of their performance. $495 fi. o. b. Toledo $&9§ S. o. b. Toledo $795 S. o. b. Toledo MASON'S GARAGE TOWSON, MARYLAND 685 F. O. B. DETROIT This car can be obtained through the Ford Weekly 'Purchase 'Plan. Four-Door Sedan Interior Features A cozy, attractive interior has been achieved in the Ford Four-Door Sedan. Broadcloth upholstery, soft brown with a slightly darker stripe, harmonizes with the lighter shade in the head lining. Silk poplin shades are provided. Ornamental interior fittings including door handles, dome light base, window regulators and shade mountings are finished in nickel. Doors are made of one solid sheet of heavy aluminum, very light and strong. Copper covered rubber door bumper prevents rattling. A water tight windshield, easy and positive to adjust, cowl ventilator, and visor are other much appreciated improvements. HENRY RECKORD TOWSON, MD. CARS (L/aOfl©&{) with y@G9- m® v@u stsip &mfflK (By D. P.) BE A BOOSTER. "Do you know there's lots of people Settin' round in every town, Growlin' like a broody chicken, Knockin' every good thing down? Don't you be that kind of grouch, Cause they ain't no use on earth, You just be a booster rooster, Crow and boost for all you're worth. If your lodge needs boostin', boost 'er, Don't hold back and wait to see If some other fellow's willin'— Sail right in, this country's free. No one's got a mortgage on it. It's just yours as much as his; If your town is shy on boosters, You get in the boostin' biz. If things just don't seem to suit you, And the world seems kinder wrong What's the matter with a boostin' Just to .elp the thing along. 'Cause if ' hings should stop a-goin' We'd be in a sorry plight, You just keep that horn a-blowin'— Boost 'er up with all your might. If you know some fellow's failin's Just forget 'em, 'cause you know That the same chap's got some good points, Them's the ones you want to show. "Cast your loaves out on the waters They'll come back," a sayin' true, Mebbe, too, they'll come back "buttered" When some feller boosts for you." PRETTY GOOD LOGIC. One Friday a village priest in Ireland found Tim Doolan licking his lips over a dish of smoking beef sausages. "Timothy Doolan," said he, "is it on a blessed Friday ye'd sell yer sowl for a dish of mate?" "Tain't mate, yir riverence," said Tim. "Sure, it's only a triflle of sausage." "It's mate," retorted the priest, "and ye'll do a pennance. Ye'H bring a load of wood to me house tomorrow." Tim concurred. Next morning, as the priest stepped from his house he discovered Tim in the act of tipping a cartload of sawdust into the woodshed. "Timothy," he exclaimed, "what's this?" "It's the pennance. sure," said Tim. "But I said wood; that's not wood." "Well," replied the unabashed Tim, "if sausage is mate, that's wood." GOAT GETS AN EARPUIi. A man "butted in" at a waaiting line before the railroad ticket window at New Yorw, and the men who were in a hurry glowered. "I want a ticket for Boston," said the man, and put 50 cents under the wicket. "You can't go to Boston for 50 eents," returned the ticket seller. "Well, then," asked the man, "where can I go for 50 cents?" And each of the fourteen men in that waiting room told him where he could go. TRY THIS ON YOUR WIFE. If your wife laughs at your joke, you can be sure that it's either a darn good joke, or you got a darn good wife. LOCATED. "Look here!" exclaimed the stranger, as he stumbled into his twentieth puddle, "I thought you said you knew where all the bad places were on this road?" "Well," replied the native, who had volunteered to guide him through the dark, we're a-finding them, ain't we?" LUCID MOMENTS. While the late Dr. John P. Gray, who had a national reputation for j the care of the insane, wis superintendent of the State Lunatic Asylum at Utica, some repairs were being made to one of the buildings. A number of the patients who were allowed to do light work around the grounds were engaged in carrying to another part of the firounds some of the bricks and mortar from a wall which was being torn down. A wheelbarrow was given to one of them and after it was loaded with brick, etc., he was started off. Or his return, however, the wheelbarrow was being trundled upside down. In this position he circled the grounds with his barrow several times, until finally he met Dr. Gray. "Here, you!" said the doctor, "turn that barrow the other way." "Not much," replied the patient, I had it that way and a lot of those fools over there filled it up with bricks." NEW ZEALAND OFFICIAL LAUD® U. S. TELEPHONES Government System Head Would Adopt Methods Used By Americans. The telephone service in the United States "is recognized as the most efficient service in the world," declared the Hon. J. G. Coates, Postmaster-General of the Dominion of New Zealand, in a discussion of certain proposed changes in the regulations and charges' of the New Zealand telephone system, which is operated as a part of the Post Office Department of the Dominion Government. Mr. Coates voiced high hopes for the future of the telephone service under his direction, and even expressed the opinion that "within a reasonable time New Zealand subscribers can expect an exchange service . . . equal to that in the United States of America." "It has been the desire of my principal departmental officers for some considerable time," the Postmaster-General declared, "to provide an efficient and popular telephone service to equitably meet all conditions." He added that he expected the amended regulations and charges would materially assist in that direction. According to the latest statistics on the sulbject, however, New Zealand has fewer than eight telephones for each 100 of population, as against thirteen telephones per 100 people in the United States. In fact the entire Dominion of New Zealand has fewer telephones than the City of Minneapolis. FINDS ANCIENT ARAB IS TELEPHONE STOCK OWNER The Christian Science Monitor quotes from a book by George Blake Dexter, entitled, "The Lure of Amateur Collecting," an interesting and unusual incident. The author, while traveling in Arabia, was invited by an Arab friend to visit the house of his father. After describing his ceremonious introduction to the home, he said: "Presently a major-domo came and led me through a long hall and into a small room. "Reclining on a couch was my host, a fine-looking Arab with snow-white beard and dressed in a long garment of plum-colored silk lined with light yellow. He bowed most courteously and motioned me to sit or recline on a couch opposite. "Much to my astonishment he spoke excellent English and asked me about America. Then without a change of expression, he said, 'What can you tell me about Tel. and Tel. stock?' "I was thunderstruck. "Then he explained. " 'My broker in Paris, who advises me, some years ago recommended me to invest in Tel. and Tel.; so I did and it turned out well. I only fear that some day they may invent something better.' "My assurance seemed to please him, and we drifted into the usual conversation of two people from the opposite ends of the world." WINTER CLEARANCE SALE of the Towson Bargain Store 408 York Road, Towson, Md. Outfitters From Head To Foot For The Entire Eamily. Special Attention Given To Mail or Phone Orders Towson 83-J Men's Flannel Shirts, Khaki or Blue. Reg-. $1.50 value ...........98c Men's 50c and 75c Rubber Belts....19c Men's Khaki Pants. Reg-. $2 value. $1.39 Men's Blue Chambra Work Shirts 59c Men's and Young Men's Riding Pants. Reg $2.50. Special......$1.69 Men's Wool Mixed Socks. Reg. 39c and 50c values ......... 25c Men's Ribber Fleeced Shirts and Drawers. Reg. $1.25 Garments. All Sizes.............. 69c Men's Khaki All Wool Pull Over' ' Sweaters. Special............$119 Men's Silk Ties. Values up to 75c, 25c Men's All Wool Flannel Shirts, in Gray, Blue, Khaki and Check. Reg. $5 Value. Special $2.49 Men's Sanitary Fleece Lined Union Suits. Reg. $2.50 value. Special......................$1.49 Men's and Young Men's Hats. Reg. $2.50 and $3. All colors and styles .....................$1.45 Men's Sheep Lined Coats. Leatherette or Briar proof, full 36 inch, best coat made. Special $10.98 All Leather Puttees or Leggins, in Black or Brown. Spring or Strap Style. Special ...........$2.75 Men's Raincoats, Reg. $6 Value Special......................$3.69 Men's $4 and $5 Kersey Pants $2.98 Men's Clocked Heather Hose, in all colors ......................25c Men's and Young Men's Cassi-mere and Worsted Long Pants, in neat stripes and plain checked ....................$2.75 Men's Blue Denim Overalls, Gi- bralter Brand...............$1.49 Men's Reg. $1.50 Coat Sweaters. All colors and sizes. Special.... $98c Men's Socks .....................9 y2 c Men's and Young Men's Reg. $1.50 and $2 Caps ...............98c Men's Rubber Boots. Fine Quality. All sizes.................$2.25 Men's and Ladies' Rubbers, All sizes..........................98c Men's Sturdy Brown Work Shoes; soft, flexible, re-tan leather, uppers nailed and sewed. Sizes 6 to 11. Special. .. .$2.75 Men's and Young Men't $2 and $3 Dress Shirts ...............$1.49 Men's Fine Quality Dress Shoes Latest patterns, Good-year-Welt Rubber Heels. Special ..$3.98 2-in-l Shoe Polish. All colors ...10c Men's Soft Collars. All sizes.....10c Boys' Black, Strongly Constructed McKay Sewed Bluchers. Reg. $3 value .................$1.98 Boys' Suits; Corduroy or Worsted. Some with 2 pair Pants Special......................$5.98 Boys' Overcoats; Haringtone Weaves, Plaids and Chinchillas. Sizes 5 to 17 years ......$8.75 Boys' Stockings, Brown or Black 19c Boys' Fleeced Suits .... or Ribbed Union ....................98c Boys Caps ............... 45c and 69c Boys' All Wool Sweaterrs. Coat or Slipovers. Values up to $4.50. Special ...............$2.25 Boys' Blouses, 8 to 15. In Percale, Chambra, Gingham, etc. ...45c Rain Caps.............. 79c Boys' Khaki Pants ......."!!!!! !75o Boys' Cloth Knickers, sizes 6 to 17 98c Boys' and Gents' All Leather Dress Shoes, with or without Rubber rHeels. Special .......$2.49 Boys' Waist Suits, in Rep ,Serge Combination Poplin and Cassi-mere.........................98c Children's Acorn Bodies........... 22c Children's Fine Ribbed Vests or Pants........................59c Children's Black blockings, all sizes.........................10c Children's three-fourth Length Mercerzied Stockings. Brown or Black.....................25c Children's Flannelette or Satin Bloomers.....................25c Kiddies' Gowns and Pajamas, in good quality Flanellette ........59c Handkerchiefs, Red, White, Blue ..5o Children5s Black or Tan Button or Lace Shoes. Sizes 3 to 8 $1.19 Ladies' Flannelette Night Gowns 75c Women's Brassieres, all sizes ....25c Women's Scotch Flannelette Gowns, long sleeves, high neck —pink or blue stripes. Special $98c Women's Flannelette Bloomers ..49c Clark's O. N. T. Cotton, Black or White. 150 yards .............5c Ladies' and Misses' Trimmed, Ready to Wear Hats. Values up to $8.00...................$2.98 Gray Bed Blankets. Extra Heavy Special................$1.25 Women's Stockings. Black, White or Brown ..............10c Women's Coat Sweaters. Reg. $1.50 Value. All Sizes. Special ..98c Ladies' and Misses' Smart Footwear, in new sport models, in patent satin, dull and tan. Spec. $3.49 Kiddies' Creepers and Rompers, in Flannelette and Fleece ......59c Kiddies' Winter Coats, White Chinchilla, Serge or Corduroy. Special......................$3.25 Children's Rompers and Panty Dresses. Sizes 2 to 6 ..........89c Infants' First Step Shoes, Black or Brown ....................59c Ladies' and Misses' Sport Hose in heather, cloaks, dropstitch and siltes.....................49c Ladies'5 and Misses' Brown, Vici Kid Lace Boots. Sizes 21/2 to 8......................$2.75 Babv's 50 Rubber Pants .........23c Kiddies* All Wool Coat or Slipover Sweaters .................$2.25 WOODPECKER'S AND LIGHTNING RUIN MANY TELEPHONE POLES A LOSING GAME. She lost her poise when he tried to hold her hand and openly rebuked him. When he attempted to put his arm around her she lost her temper and told him a thing or two. He begged her pardon and promised not to do it again. Then she lost interest. A news item from Olympia, Wash., states that 20 000 cedar telephone poles in that state are being replaced and that two out of every ten have been rendered unfit for service by two causes, woodpeckers and lightning. The white-headed woodpecker has an avidity for boring the poles full of holes. As cedar is not attacked by insects, naturalists advance the theory that the woodpecker digs the holes a« storage places for nuts, berries and other food. In the foothills of the mountain ranges lightning plays havoc with the telephone poles. SHE KNEW WHERE. "Hubby," announced Mrs. Styl-over, "I'm going to town tomorrow to see the new hats." "You forget," her husband reminded her, "that tomorrow is Sunday. The shops will be closed." "Who said anything about shops?" she retorted. "I'm going to church." ONE REASON FOR REPORTS OF "TELEPHONE OUT OF ORDER" In replacing the telephone receiver on its hook hurriedly after a conversation, it happens sometimes that the receiver is allowed to rest on a book or other object, so that the hook remains elevated just as it is when the receiver is off the hook, as a result, the signal light on the switchboard does not flash to notify the switchboard operator that the subscriber has finished, the Chesapeake and Potomac Telephone Company states. When this happens to you, your telephone is cut off and no one can get you. The operator will perceive that something is wrong after a time and try to attract your attention by means of the "howler" which makes an audible sound in your telephone, or she will try to reach you through some other telephone. All this takes a lot of time when she might be serving other subscribers and you have no service until the condition is corrected. In the aggregate much time aud service is lost in this way HBSE3ESHEK. In proportion to the population there are ten times as many telephones in the United States as there are in Europe. SHE COULDN'T . Joe—"I saw Miss Dimples at the masquerade ball last night." Jim—"What did she take off?" Joe—"Nothing; «if she had taken off anything more, she'd have been arrested." The City of Springfield, Massachusetts, which has practically the same population as Auckland, has nearly three times as many telephones as the New Zealand city. January Clearance Sale WOMEN'S COATS $25.00 Winter Coats $15.00 Women's and Misses' Velour and Plush Coats that were originally sold at $25.00 in chic straight line models Velour Coats in shades Brown, Reindeer, Navy and Black, with Fur Collars. Plush Coats with large Fur Collar and Cuffs Sizes 18 to 44 $15 ¦ a ¦ BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB; © Maryland State Archives mdsa_sc3410_1_81-0885.jpg |