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Maryland State Archives Jeffersonian, Towson, Maryland mdsa_sc3410_1_63-0354 Enlarge and print image (6M) |
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Maryland State Archives Jeffersonian, Towson, Maryland mdsa_sc3410_1_63-0354 Enlarge and print image (6M) |
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November 13, 1920—Page 6
THE JEFFERSONIAN, TOWSON, MARYLAND.
HOME FRIENDLY SOCIETY
INDUSTRIAL INSURANCE
1025 LINDEN AVENUE BALTIMORE
6-1-20
Uncle Jake Is Back With His Line
Of Talk Alter An Absence
01 Several Weeks
AT THE SWITCH
We have everything prescribed by physicians and our compounding Is conducted with skill and care by graduates of pharmacy. The special care which we give to
PRESCRIPTIONS
has caused our prescription department and every other department of our drug business to grow. This growth is continuous because people believe in pure drugs, superior service r \ right prices. Let Us Fill Your Next Pre*' ptlon
STROBEL PHARMACY, Inc.
"The Prescription Store"
York Road 2-i-iy GOVANS, BALTIMORE, MD
Inquiries Are Welcomed
And Answered Promptly—
When You Address Them
To
HOCHSCHILD,KOHN &C0.
Whatever your needs—dress materials, , wearables for any member of the family, shoes, furnishings for the home, or any other merchandise which we carry— Write for descriptions and prices. We will be glad to furnish you with the desired information, fresh and up-to-the minute. Inquiries are handled by experienced shoppers, who take pride in rendering their patrons by mail the courteous service for which Baltimore's Best Store is noted.
HOCHSCHILD.KOHN &,Co.
Howard bid Lexington Sts.
LiAN SAKES! Price, Watson, Dietz and Hatch got durn nigh bout as good er lickin as ther Demykrat's did all over ther Junited States, cause ther gol durn garter, er charter, er whatever them there yapal called it, got kinda snowed under, by heck. Lection night yer Uncle Jake decided ter go to the city from Gobler's Knob ter hear ther returns, and being's that yer Uncle Jake's olt tin lizzie's all busted up, and while he was er pondering jest how ter git there, erlong came ole Jacobus Rastus Pedro, what's ther venter of ther shoot-er-mo-bod, and volunteered ter carry yer Uncle Jake's carcusi ter Balitmoretown via his gol durn new contrapshun. Ther thing what ole Jacobus vented and what yer Uncle Jake and he flitted ter ther city in through ther air, bout 283,941,395,990 kill -3o - fellers er minute ain't nothing more than er ole bicycle contrapshun, hooked up with er dish pan on each side and er umbrella raised and fastened over ther handle bars— but yer Uncle Jake was told ther umbrella wasn't fer rain. Anyhow ole Jacobus got on ther seat and begun ter paddle ther jigger along, and before yer Uncle Jake could mop ther mosts from his ole eyes, and* could git his equliberum, we was er traveling through space with not er blame thing underneath us but air. Somehow er other ole Jacobus forgot ter light ther search light and all yer Uncle
Jake could see was ther batting eyes of ther owls as ther contrapshun sped on an on, headed fer Baltimore, and from ther sensation, getting some-
Established 1865
WM. A. CONWAY
Jobber of
TINNERS' SUPPLIES
Metal Roofings, Painted-Corrugated, V-Crimped and Galvanized Double Lock Roll Roofing
For Dwellings, Garages and Barni
Stove and Furnace Goods
of all sorts.
All Sizes Railroad Milk Cans.
WM. A. CONWAY
626-28 FORREST ST.
Phones, Mt. Vernon 2751 or 1999
Write Today for Prices 4-13-20
HOWE
TIRES
Distributed
Towson
Opposite Court House Phone, Towson 490
The Eureka
Life Insurance
Company
BALTIMORE, MD.
Incorporated 1882 The Eureka Life is now a legal Reserve Old Line Stock Life Insurance Company with 37 years commendable history back of it. Issues Every Form of Modern Life nsurance. ll-l-ly
TO-DAY modern transportation is necessary to every business. The day has long gone by when any old time will do for making deliveries. Every business concern and farmer in America is working hard to increase their efficiency in the commercial world.
IS YOUR TRANSPORTATION DEPARTMENT a holdback to your progress? If so, let us tell you how we can bring this department up to the 100 % mark with "BROCKWAY THE RIGHT WAY."
Brockway Motor Truck Co. of Baltimore, inc.
1921-27 NORTH CHARLES STREET
MT. VERNON 1866
where. After we had done flitted bout er couple dozen miles er so there was er awful crash and ther seat of yer Uncle Jake's pants got caught in ther branch of er tree, and whether ole Jacobus kept on going er not ain't been ascertained yit. ' 'Taint not er word been heard from him. After er couple hundred wiggles, wriggles and twists yer Uncle Jake managed ter git loose, and with er thump landed plum on ther ground, right side up, and durned if I wasn't on ther roof of ther Court House at Baltimoretown, and ther only thing that saved yer Uncle Jake from being marooned up there all night was ther fact that he had gone ter ther store that afternoon ter git Mame er spool er cotton, and forgot ter give it ter her, and it was still in his gol durn ole pocket. Tying one end of ther thread ter ther flag pole on ther court house roof, yer Uncle Jake chucked ther spool over to er telegraph pole cross ther street, and it was done with such force that it jest nacherly winded itself round ther thing, and being's that yer Uncle Jake was once er slack wire walker, he strutted out ter safety, and when nigh bout near ther pole ther gol durn cotton broke and yer Uncle Jake landed plum on er street car top and was carried at her high rate er speed ter some loutlandish place, and was compelled ter bunk in er sand' quarry all night. Peers ter me it'd been durn site better if I'd stayed up on the court roof.
YE GODS! Yer Uncle Jakes spies tell him that on Wednesday morning of last week ther was er crepe on ther house of the esteemed, ancient and honorable Willie Price's, ther dignified and disgruntled Ernest Hatch's ther ristocratic brother Watson's.
HOLY MO'SES! Ther lection in Baltimore county clearly proved ter yer Uncle Jake that ther women didn't know, as usual, jest what they was doin when they was votin. They certainly did play hell with her ballot, and it kinda looks that ther majority of them ud rather ride on er elephant than on er donkey. What helped more than anything else ter defeat Carville Benson was ther treatchery in his own ranks, but by golly that ain't here nor there. Ther Demykrats lost and lost gol durn bad, and there ain't no us»e crying over spilt milk. Us fellers what belong to ther Demykrat party '11 have ter think
r£H3-[^M.
Introduce Your Business to—
fiw*^
THE FEDERAL, MOTOR
AND SALES CO.,
803-807 Lf»w St.,
Baltimore, - Md.
ESSEX.
Thrown from his mother's' arms ,when she was struck by an automobile house , Tuesday morning, 7-months-old Alfred Bursey, of Essex, was picked up unhurt near the scene of the accident. Mrs. Bursiey, carrying the child, was cross) ng Franklin avenue when she and was knocked down by the machine. Passersby lifted the injured woman into the car of Mrs. Charles Wiley and she was taken to the City Hospital. Michael Schmietman, driver of the machine that struck Mrs. Bursey, was taken to the North Point Police Station, but was releasfed'on his own recognizance. Mrs. Bursey is said to be in a critical condition.
GLiEJVARM.
tner uemyKrat yariy 11 nave lvi umm last Fridav was a decided sueress of ther old saying "if at first yer don't sociaf r™hlld by the ladies of T
succeed, try, try ergain." But it appears ter yer Uncle Jake that ther trick ballot what Harry German and his tribe put over, cording ter that ole blizzad-busting Onion News, didn't have much feet with the peeple, cause ther charter got er trouncing nevertheless.
CEAZER'S GHOST! There's er cer-
tain young gentleman in Towsontown i last week
The box social held at D. O. King's
The _ Union M. E. Church, who know well how to prepare lunches, which was enjoyed by all.
Dr. and Mrs. Armstrong were entertained at the home of Mr. and Mrs. W. Chammings over Sunday.
Miss Marian Winkler and Mr. Oliver Stifler were married on Wednesday of
what's; been sleeping too close to er bottle yer of late, and it ain't no hair tonic bottle at that, but jedging from ther fumes what comes from his mouth it's er pretty good brand er fire water.
SPUTTERING FIRE FLYS- When it comes ter gossip mills, there ain't no place in ther Junited States what's got anything on ther tonsorial parlors of ther ancient and honorable William Xander Ignatius Scissorsjirinus Koer-ner, in Towsontown. When ther conversation ain't hoss racing, it's some other durn foreign diflumigating matter. Why, er bunch er ole hens at er tea party coldn't be worse. Nuff sed.
SIZZLING SAUSAGES! Ther first man ter ask ther ouija board where he mislaid that quart er liquor smiles when anybody mentions ther gol durn contrapshun, cause he belongs to ther Elks. Ther first man ter sit in at a iouija board duet with er brunette shows little interest when ther subject er occulation is mentioned. He is now er member of ther divorce colony at Reno. Ther feller what conceived ther idea of "playing ther market" a la ther spooks, grins er gol durn silly grin when ther subject is mentioned. He's got er life meal ticket at ther Pittsburgh Detention Hous e fer the Indigent. If ever yer come on er man from Skincinnati what twitches his lips when you mention ther ouija. board, study him well. He was ther first yap ter ask advice as to ther value of four kings which he held. He an ther guy what asked similar advice bout ther sweepstakes are charter members of the Goof Club. Ther first and (as fer as yer Uncle Jake knows) only man ter peddle Cascade oil stock upon ther advice of ther ouija board now laughs on the other side of his gol durn ole mouth. He's a member of ther honor farm colony at the State penitentiary.
YEA CLBOPATRICK! Peers to yer Uncle Jake that ther Demygratsi in this yer county had better have er git tergether movement and git ready fer next fall's battle. From what yer Uncle Jake kin observe its er case of ter Hell with ther party, and everybody fer themselves, and blame if this yer aint er fine state of erfairs. Why, I wouldn't be afraid ter bet my gol durn ole life, including all my duds, that there was er lot er what some folks sez is good sraight Demykrats' what voted ergainst Carv Benson at ther recent lection. Now 'taint no use arguin, this yer's a fact, er undisputed fact, er diabolical outrage. It's jest sech things as what occurred on November second that gives ther 'Publicans) hopes and faith, and makes them stick out ther blame ole chests. Ter Uncle Jake knows plum well ther Demykrats kin carry this yer county if they goes bout it right, but recognition must be given the young men. and- efforts made to reconcile ther fellers what's on ther outside. Take er ole fool's 'vice and git tergether, by heck.
Miss Lucy Burton spent this week with her sister, Mrs, John Schneider.
We are glad to know that Mr. Wm. Shearman, who met with a serious accident while going to market last week is very much better.
Mr. and Mrs. J. Schneider and their son, Burton, were guests of Mrs. Schneider's mother, Mrs. George Burton .
THROUGH A VERY CLOSE INSPECTION AND MECHANICAL AID WE FIND THE LITTLE
Modle 4 Overland and Willys-Night
TO BE THE MOST DURABLE AND SERVICE ABLE CARS ON THE MARKET
SALES AND SERVICE STATION
NATIONAL GARAGE
17-Mile House York Road, SPARKS, MD.
Cockeysville 53-F-3. 2-14-52w
For
Job Printing
THAT CATCHES THE EYE
Phone, Towson 289
THE JEFERSONIAN OFFICE
Have You Something
ri^ C-11 0 Advertise in 1 O Oeil f— THE JEFFERSONIAN
"It Covers The Community Like The Dew"
Real Freedom
You would never guess the relief you get from using
FAIRYFOOT
They relieve the pain
ewe 11-r and soreness, soothe and re-the joint to normal size. You feel the thrill of contented feet in two hours or less
after applying FAIRT-, FOOT. GUARANTEED and Bold on FreeTrlal.
HERGEJfRATHER DRUK CO. Towson, Maryland.
Does Your Husband Come Home Tired,
Nervous, Irritable?
Physician Says Thousands Of Men Are Breaking Down Simply Because Their Blood Lacks Iron—Tells How To Convince A
"John, please take Nuxated Iron and. be strong and well again."
Husband That He Needs
NUXATED IRON
To Help Make
Red Blood,
Strength and
Endurance
"Simply because his blood lacks iron, many an American husband who ought to be feeling young, full of health, vigor and energy and in a position to shower his family with every comfort and luxury is actually struggling to make ends meet—a disappointed and discouraged 'old' man who will probably end up in a nervous breakdown or be carried off by his first illness," says Dr. H. B. Vail, formerly physician in the Baltimore Hospital and a Medical Examiner.
energy /"ty//f///f/r''/ and en- .v"^ .—• " durance '"Vr//*
'' Because man, in the rush and tear of modern whole life has so little time to think about his blood's sy3tem. Nuxated Iron is used by over 47000,000 condition and is often so slow to admit any people annually—used and endorsed by former weakness, the signs that his blood may be low United States Senators and Members of Congrest in iron are often first detected by the watchful, —and jn many cases to my knowledge, in-loving eyes of his wife. Does your husband creases the strength and energy and endurance of come home pale and fagged out and tpo tired run-down, nervous people in two weeks' time."
to do anything or go any where? Does he com- ., . .___, . - „„„# *w«» »««*.
plain about being overworked—the lack of op- ,jj y°ur husband asks for prool! that lack
portunity today-^ome otherfellow'sluck? Does °?lro" » "?*ftn8 hlm nervous, weak and holding
hefindfaultwiththefood.thehomeortheyoung- h.m back in life..you can probably convmce him
sters' behavior? Does he seem unablef or one rea- w'thAhe following test: Have him see how^ Ion|
son or another to get ahead and make big money ^ can work or how far he cani walk-""bout
~ vm. ™Hh» r,r,rf rr.nfidf.ntlv P-rnprtpH?" becoming tired. Next have him take two tablets
ab you and he once confidently expected? of Nuxated Iron three time9 daily after meals
"Then it may well be true that his blood lacks f0r two weeks. Then let him test his strength
iron, for the men with plenty of iron in their and see how much he has gained,
blood are the healthy, strong ones with the Manufacturers'Note: Nux&ted Iron, which
keen minds and the physical energy and stamina Is recommended above is not a secret remedy bat
to overcome all obstacles—make their own op- one which Is well known to druggists everywhere.
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