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Maryland State Archives Jeffersonian, Towson, Maryland mdsa_sc3410_1_63-0069 Enlarge and print image (6M) |
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Maryland State Archives Jeffersonian, Towson, Maryland mdsa_sc3410_1_63-0069 Enlarge and print image (6M) |
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YE GODS! IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHERE GOBBLER'S KNOB IS, YOU DON'T KNOW "UNcis JAKE," HE'S THE YAP THAT HANDLES NO ONE, OR NO THING WITH KID GLOVES.
IT WILL PAY YOU TO
PATRONIZE OUR
ADVERTISERS
THE JEFFERSONIAN
If
WITH THE PEOPLE, BY THE PEOPLE, FOR THE PEOPLE
ft
Equal and exact justice to all men of whatever state or persuasion, religious or political. —Jefferson.
VOL. IX. No. 11
It Covers The Community Like The Dew"
TOWSON, MARYLAND, SATURDAY, MARCH 6, 1920
MARYLAND JOURNAL. ESTABLISHED 18*J5 I CONSOLIDATED 1915
BALTIMORE CO. DEMOCRAT BSTAB. 1888 f WITH THE JEFFERSONIAN.
HOW ABOUT IT?
Uncle Jake Wants To Know What
Has Become Ot Poet Wilson
Of The "Onion News."
Holy Smokes! Gol dura if that feller Burns, at Towsontown, what digs holes and chucks folks in ther ground an' covers them up with 6 feet o' dirt, worms an' all, didn't come up ter Gobbler's Knob ther other night ter git yer Uncle Jake's carcus an' All it full o' 'balmin' fluid, but 'stead o' seein' er crowd 'round ther coolin' board admir-in' how nice yer Uncle Jake's clothes fit him an' sayin' don't he look natural, he found yer Uncle Jake full o' pep an' mad as er blue devil, an' ther seat er ther ancient an'.honorable Burns' pants was introduced ter yer Uncle Jake's shoemaker, 'cause with one kick ther grave digger was hurled er couple hundred thousand kill-o-feliers, an' that he had ter go home in er barrel, there ain't er gol durn bit er doubt, 'cause er nail in ther toe er yer Uncle Jake's boot detained ther best portion er his pants. Them folks what's determined ter
have yer Uncle Jake dead as "Hec-ter's pup," has got er 'nother think comin' ter them, 'cause them monkey glands what ol' Doc Killum pasted in yer Uncle Jake's neck while he was sick, jes' turned his 92 years back ter 29 an' he's got all ther ginger an' pep o' er "two year ol'," an' as fer as yer Uncle Jake's concerned boot leg!
gin', kab-er-ruts, B^BJ
dice slingin' progressive pitch an' all ther other devilish conglomerations kin hold full sway while yer Uncle Jake's Mayor.
Ye Gods! Ever since ther ol' German cannon captured at Waterloo, by Ol' General Disturbance, Gobbler's Knobls ancient an' distinguished bullet dodger an' champion retreater, what has served in all ther wars from ther invasion er Rome by ther Greeks down, Ol' Putus Dreamingbliter's been work-in' on er patent ter do without ther Kobbler's Knob volunteer fire department. There tesjt was on Monday night, when Mrs. Sarah Pruneater's boardin' house got on Are by ther combustion o' ther cat bumpin' inter ther lamp, an' which nigh 'bout cost ther lives er Mrs. Pruneater's couple dozen half-starved boarders, as it was after Continued on Page 5, Col. 3.)
SOLD BY MOONLIGHT
Purchaser Buys Farm After Seeing It Only Under Soft Rays Of The Moon.
Farms in Baltimore county are in great demand and for everyone advertised or known to be for sale many go miles to visit them. Probably the most unique sale was made here this week, when one night Mr. W. A. Phillip, a real estate dealer in the "upper end" sold the farm of Mr. Albert Mays, near Evna, by moonlight. The purchaser having inspected same only by the light of the glistening moon.
FIRST CANdTdATE FILES
One Hat In Ring For Congressional Honors From Second District.
Probably the old adage which says that "the early bird catches the worm," induced ^Arthur L. Halt, of Walbrook, to file with the Board of Election Supervisors! of Towso |